Sunday, June 24, 2012

Being Emo

I am grateful for emo moments.

Yes, emo moments. Since puberty I've had them. And I've always blamed PMS for the longest time. But now...hmmm...I still blame hormones, or the lack of it. 

Every once in a while I make like a telenovela star and give in to a healthy dose of melancholy. A sprinkle of angst here, a pinch of self-pity there, and a dash of depression everywhere.



Maybe I'm a drama queen by nature--a closet drama queen that's not much into making PDA (public displays of angst) or bothering others about personal issues.



Personally, I think there are some feelings that are better sorted out when you let out a good cry...alone. Even though you're very well aware what's wrong in your life and you know how an enlightened person should think and act, you still feel an almost physical heaviness in your heart that just can't be lifted with even a thousand happy thoughts.


So when I feel this way, I entertain the blues. Purging them with the help of sad songs, romantic comedies, and Disney movies.


And while crying my eyes out and trying to breathe as I feel so very sorry for myself, that's when I would suddenly have an epiphany. Through the tears and the whispered prayers to God, I would feel lighter, think clearer. Realization slowly seeps in that I don't really have it that bad and I have a lot to be thankful for. Maybe you do actually have to hit bottom to bounce back up. Sadness may not be of God but it sure helps you find Him. :)






No comments:

Post a Comment